Syrup and Pancakes

“Order up!”
“Syrup and pancakes again?”
“Of course. What else would it be?”
“But I’m tired of syrup and pancakes.”
“It fills you up, though. If don’t eat syrup and pancakes, you won’t get fed.”
“I feel sick.”
“That’s your fault, not the syrup and pancakes. Take a nap or something.”
“I need water.”
“There’s water in the pancakes.”
“Can I have a salad?”
“Nope.”
“Why not?”
“Salad has never been on the menu before and we’re not about to put in on there now, just because you don’t happen to like syrup and pancakes.”
“It’s not that I don’t like it… it’s that syrup and pancakes isn’t all I ever want to eat.”
“Tough. This is what food is.”
“But I need something substantial. I need something alive. Give me a salad. And some grilled meat. Chicken, maybe.”
“Sorry, we only serve syrup and pancakes. It’s that or nothing.”
“Then nothing, I guess. There’s a place down the street that serves salad. Maybe I’ll go there.”
“How dare you! You don’t want to be a salad-eater! They’re out of touch! They’re wishy-washy! You start eating salads and then what? Who’s to stop you from adding in a little bleu cheese? A little olive oil? Before you know it, you could be eating anything! It would be a disaster.”
“Still better than syrup and pancakes.”
“Fine, you know what? You’re not worthy of these syrup and pancakes.”
“I don’t want them.”
“And we’re never serving you again!”
“Okay.”
“And don’t even bother coming back here until you decide to start liking syrup and pancakes!”
“That won’t happen.”
“Then you’re damned!”
“Not really.”
“You’ll miss us, just wait and see. We’ll be here, when you decide to come back into the fold.
…hello?”

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